The Greatest Gift For Your Child

Early this morning I was woken with a start as I heard my wife yell out: “Don’t!” Immediately I was brought to attention, looked around, and turned towards her in bed. As I reached out to make sure Zerrin was ok, she mumbled something about how the man from the Cox Cable Co shouldn’t do any plumbing. I knew then, she was simply talking in her sleep as she periodically does. We both began to chuckle. Then she said something that is just like my wife. It was once again humorous and yet remarkable…

Still lying in bed, Zerrin laughed as she said: “Life with me is an adventure–even while sleeping!”  And we both laughed some more.

I didn’t sleep very well the last couple hours of the morning. I kept mulling over the bright nature of my wife’s last comment. Before long I was thinking:  there is a a blog post to write here!

One of the many blessings my wife has brought to our marriage and family has been her ability to put a positive swing to almost everything – even to a “Cox Cable man turned plumber” dream early in the morning!

Sometimes in our marriage her positive spirit would drive me nuts–because I tend to be a bit opposite. I just want her to commiserate with me. Over time however I have come to marvel at how she is able to “re-perspectivize” almost anything negative. (And yes I made up that word!) Through doing so she has become my greatest source of encouragement.

Now here’s the clincher: she got that from her father.

ALT="A Father's greatest gift is who he becomes!"

My wife Zerrin and her Father

If you thought Zerrin was positive, we BOTH sit back in awe at how her father, now almost 90, still manages to put a positive swing on everything. EVERY TIME we talk to him on the phone or visit him back in Michigan, we come away conversing about his bright perspectives on life.

This characteristic in my wife’s father has positively affected all of her 6 siblings, 14 grandchildren, and the growing number of great-grandchildren. My father-in-law, and the man he has become, is a compelling model for his entire family.

I believe it could be argued, the greatest gift we can give our children is the gift of who we become!

Who are you?

Who are you becoming?

We are all on a journey and all in process. Who we become on that journey and in that process has the power to call others forward in life or set them back.

This is why I am so burdened to see couples press forth with their commitment to each other in marriage and to each one’s own personal growth. Again I will say, who you are and who you become will make all the difference in the world and in your children’s lives.

Stop and think a moment:

  • Have you grown weary or given up? Start again, and show your children how to finish well.
  • Are you bitter? Seek as far as it is possible on your end, to let go and forgive–thereby demonstrating the importance of mending relationships.
  • Do you know your areas of weakness? Find someone to talk to about them and get help. Model to your children humility and what it is like to pursue maturity rather than a life of pride.
  • Are you chasing after dreams of success?  Driven to make a lot of money? Turn instead to focusing on your marriage and family. You will never regret that in the end.
  • For those of you who follow Christ–press on! Keep growing! Run and finish the race well. In so doing you will create wonder in the hearts of your children about the God you serve, and stir up hunger in them to love and serve Him in the same manner.

The greatest gift you can give to your children is…




Where are you growing? What do you appreciate about your spouse? Leave a comment below or email me.

ALSO–if you were stirred by what I wrote, would you share it with others? We are seeking to build a tribe of couples who want to love each other well and become the greatest possible example to their children and the world around them!

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

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